Relationship Goals Ep. 4: “Strengthen Your Marriage: Biblical Relationship Goals for a Healthy Life”

January 6, 2025 Brian Jones

Singleness can feel like an overlooked season in life, especially in a culture where the idea of marriage and family is often emphasized as the end goal. Yet, singleness isn’t merely a waiting period—it’s a gift with a unique purpose. For those navigating life without a spouse, this perspective can be refreshing and freeing. In fact, this article explores why singleness offers distinct opportunities for faithfulness and how it can be used to glorify God in ways that marriage may not. Click the video link above for the full message.

Understanding the Purpose of Singleness

Singleness, according to scripture, isn’t just about waiting for a future spouse—it’s about pursuing faithfulness to Christ in the here and now. Our ultimate purpose in life isn’t to get married or have children. These are good desires, but they aren’t promises or commands. The goal is something much greater: a life dedicated to following Jesus.

Parents, too, can benefit from this reminder. While raising and discipling children is a priority, it’s not the sole purpose of life. God’s kingdom expands beyond biological family. There are people outside of our family circles who need love, leadership, and spiritual guidance.

Singleness Is a Gift with a Purpose

The apostle Paul refers to singleness as a gift. In 1 Corinthians 7, Paul writes, “I wish that all of you were as I am. But each of you has your own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that” (1 Corinthians 7:7 NIV). Paul saw his singleness as an opportunity to serve God with undivided devotion. He wasn’t implying that marriage was bad but highlighting that being single provides unique freedom to focus entirely on God’s mission.

If you’re single and wondering whether this applies to you, Paul offers a simple answer: If you are not currently in a covenant marriage, then you have this gift of singleness for now.

Embracing Undivided Devotion to God

Singleness allows for undivided devotion to the Lord. Married people have additional responsibilities—they must care for their spouses and children, which can divide their attention. Paul writes, “The unmarried man is concerned about the Lord’s affairs—how he can please the Lord. But a married man is concerned about the affairs of this world—how he can please his wife” (1 Corinthians 7:32-33 NIV).

This isn’t to say that marriage is wrong, but rather to encourage those who are single to fully embrace their current season. You have an incredible opportunity to focus entirely on growing spiritually, serving others, and building God’s kingdom.

Avoiding Common Pitfalls in Singleness

While singleness can be a gift, it comes with challenges, including the temptation to compromise. Paul advises against this, saying that if someone cannot control their desires, it’s better to marry than to burn with passion (1 Corinthians 7:9). However, this doesn’t mean rushing into marriage just to alleviate physical desires. A healthy marriage requires far more than attraction—it’s about spiritual partnership and mutual submission to God.

For singles, one of the greatest risks is settling for someone who doesn’t share their faith or commitment to Christ. A strong spiritual foundation is essential for any lasting relationship.

Four Practical Steps for Singles

Here are four principles that can help singles live out their season with purpose and faithfulness:

Trust God’s Sovereign Plan - Trust that God has placed you exactly where you’re supposed to be. Whether you’re single for a season or a lifetime, this moment has a purpose. Discontentment can follow you into any life stage, so learning to trust God’s plan now will help you in the future.
Do Not Compromise on Faith - The most important quality to seek in a future spouse is a genuine love for God. A marriage where both partners submit to God will have a far stronger foundation than one based on anything else.
Be the Person You Are Looking For - Instead of focusing solely on finding the right person, focus on becoming the right person. Work on your relationship with God, serve others, and grow spiritually. The person you become now will greatly influence the type of relationship you’ll have in the future.
Use Your Gift of Singleness for God’s Kingdom - Singleness offers a unique opportunity to serve God in ways that may be more difficult for married people. Go on mission trips, invest in relationships, and mentor others. Spiritual parenting—leading others to Christ and helping them grow in their faith—is one of the most impactful ways to use this season.

Building a Spiritual Family

One of the most powerful ideas Paul presents is that singleness allows you to build a large spiritual family. While married couples raise children, singles can disciple and mentor people of all ages, creating a lasting spiritual legacy. Paul and Jesus, two of the most influential figures in the Bible, were unmarried. Their spiritual impact is immeasurable because they devoted their lives fully to God’s mission.

In Heaven, our family won’t consist of spouses and children but of the people we led to Christ and invested in spiritually. This is the eternal perspective that singles are encouraged to adopt.

Call to Action: Don’t Waste Your Singleness

If you’re in a season of singleness, don’t squander it. Embrace the freedom you have to serve God wholeheartedly. Travel, make new friends, gain new experiences, and invest in your spiritual growth. Remember that your worth isn’t tied to your relationship status but to your identity as a child of God.

Whether or not marriage is in your future, your faithfulness to Christ is what ultimately matters. Focus on becoming the person God wants you to be, and trust Him with the rest.

The Hills Community Church